blog hits new Lo
When the celebrity couple of the minute get married will he take her name? Then he’ll be B. Lo. As in that movie was B.lo average, or that movie B.lows goats. Maybe. Although, you have to admit that Jenny from the Block Affleck does have a certain ring. You know what else has a certain ring? The song “Dear Ben” I swear she wrote it for me. Take a look at the last four lines if you don’t believe me. There’s no way I’d leave you/It’s just not a reality/Sometimes I feel like I’m/living in a fantasy.
Concrete evidence if I ever saw it.
Do you think her kids will call her Uber-mommy? Is Uber like so last year and I’m the only one still obsessed with it?
Like Have a Totally Happy New Year.

I look sharp in my new green shirt.
Guess what I ate for lunch? Win a prize! No, really. Guess.


Your hint: Austin, MN

6+ hours of Back to The Future. Check that off the list.
1 evening of ice skating and 1 long sit in Burletta.
2 questions:
Why didn't Kella and I hang out in college?
Why don't they make Back to the Future IV?
3 bags are a lot to carry, especially if 1 contains a snowboard.
9 old friend sightings and 1 old teacher. 3 of the 5. Next time, gentlemen. Next time.

It's like she ripped off the band-aid and now loneliness is oozing all over everything.

Maybe you had to be there
My sister was complaining that she didn't know what to do with two chest of drawers. I said one could be her "dresser" and the other could be her "undresser".
My 10-year old cousin called his friend on Christmas. Overheard, "I'm glad you're my friend. 'Cause I don't have any of that stuff."
My sister's boyfriend called during Christmas Eve dinner. My family sang "We wish you a Merry Christmas" at the top of our lungs in the direction of the phone.
Clue is an underrated boardgame.
A family of losers? 11 tickets and not a single Powerball winner.
I had intended to see in excess of 5 old friends this week. Current old friend sightings: zero.
I have given my cousin Thomas Edward a new name. Henceforth, he will be known as Tedward.
Today is my dad's birthday. He gets the dinner of his choice and usually his choice is "I don't care." That's the spirit.

This morning I rode a recumbent bike with my dad and his cycling cronies. It's comfy on the tush, for sure. Probable highlight other than the exercise: The cronies and Dad frequent a bike store where 30-something Heather works. They flirt, one nabbed some coffee, it was cute. They just wanted to wish Heather and the gang a Merry Christmas. Ah.

One grandma headed to the hospital, the other was granted a short reprieve from the nursing home. We stuffed her in the trunk (ok, skillfully wheeled her into the back of the van) and brought her home. She had a nice time and it was so good to see her out. She's such a cute grandma. I've got the biggest soft spot when it comes to Grandmas.

My family rocked out to 88 Fingers Louie's version of "All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth." You've never lived 'till you've bounced wildly to Christmas punk rock. I'm feeling a new tradition coming on. This one is going to be bigger than my last one which involved saying "Happy ____" after dinner then convulsing and screaming "Poison!" and falling to the floor.
Merry Christmas. I hope Santa visits you no matter what you're celebrating.

For some reason this whole blogging thing wasn't working on the folks computer. I could feel myself start to suffocate.
Movie reviews of movie twos and other news
Two weeks notice Sandra Bullock. Romantic Comedy. Seems to be a ticket to Dave 4 star dom. PFFFT. Sandra has officially fallen off my favorite actress list. This movie is crap. And I usually like crap. Not tonight. Hugh Grant manages some charm, but somebody somewhere should give their two weeks notice or else be fired. There were a couple of instances where I saw flashes of the old Sandra, but she's gone. This is the dawning of a new era. Start vying for my favorite actress spot. It could be yours!

The Two Towers Justin is right on here. His "rushed" scenes weren't in the book. What is Peter Jackson doing to Faramir? Legolas, however, rocks. And I loved that they kept the Gimli-Legolas Orc-killing competition as part of the movie. Big time (pun intended) sadness with the Ents. There are some serious proportion problems. I liked Treebeard when he reached down and squeezed the Hobbits, but later he's not nearly as large. Further, Ents are not that thin. Was Calista Flockhart running this show? And the scene when they leave the forest to attack is poor. In the book it's like the whole forest is on the move. This is like an army of twigs. I will say the actual attack is pretty sweet. On Friday I would've given the movie 2.5 stars. It's a solid, decent affair. It's not bad for a tweener. And Lord of the Rings is cool. After seeing Two weeks I'm bumping that up to a 3. I just found out what it could've been. Despite my complaints, I can't believe we have to wait another year for the next installment. I'm ready now.


The other news: While I imagine Columbians were rockin' to the sounds of graduation, I was missing my connection and getting stranded in Cincinnati. Word of advice, just because angry married woman is fired up about setting everything straight and blowing out of Ohio ASAP, doesn't mean that she is the best choice to lead the troops against Delta airlines. After following her for 10 minutes, I struck out on my own, got things settled for the night and made a new friend. Tommy, National Geographic Office Boy and me, AARP Office Boy holed up in the Radisson with Delta discount tickets. Delta should've payed for the lodging. They haven't heard the last from me.

-Blogging is the new e-mail.
-If Big Brother isn't watching, I wonder if he's reading my blog.
-Some people are so judgmental.
-Are Erotic Dots related to Trophy Dots?
-I thought Tom Mueller was in the Holiday Gap commercial
-Will I still be invited to dinner parties if I don't bathe?
-It's winter. It should snow, not rain.
-I bathe regularly and I still don't get invited to dinner parties.
-There is a time and a place for behavior like that.
-You can hate Dr. Laura, but sometimes she makes sense.
-Why do teens get angst, but 20-somethings are supposed to be having a blast?
-All the roomies watched the Gilmore Girls this week. We're building rapport and those gals are the foundation.

Hmm. Very interesting.

I have some friends that are graduating this very weekend. CONGRATS! to them.
I can't believe it. I can't believe I've only had said friends for 3.5 years. The kids grow up so fast these days. Good luck, my friends.


I graduated once. My big problem since is what to do with myself without a degree looming. This weekend it's see Lord of the Rings and go home to the family.


Let me just say that Back to the Future (1-3, plus extra footage) is out on DVD. I don't do DVD, but even if I did, I don't think I could be more excited. I've waited since 1887 for this. Great Scott! This is heavy.

I found out today that if I walk an extra half-mile to the next Metro stop, I'll save .15. That's like $375 every 10 years.


Now please weigh in on where I should ski/ride in the East.
Is it Killington?
Or maybe Stratton?
Sugarbrush?
Or one of these?

Finally, please just weigh in.
The fights start in under an hour.

The night brushing my teeth felt like magic
I went to a holiday party last night. We sang pop songs, watched Halloween movies set at Christmas time, and consumed a lot of sugar. Early in the evening I ate lasagna and then it's all just a whirl of gingerbread men, white-nut somethin' cookies, Nestea, Schnapps Chocolate, and on and on. It made my head hurt. And we didn't even get to the chocolate fondue.
I know a man who once said, "She was like, (super valley girl emphasis)'where am I?' in the Bermuda Triangle." And his teammates said, "Amelia Earhart". And they were right. And it was funny. And he is the best Taboo player I've ever seen.

From the blogs of note list, this is a funny site. Even better though is this little exercise in timed writing.

It’s a Practice Date

After working the first 40 hour week in I believe 13 months, I decided I deserved a little something special. So after work I took myself out. The Tuscany chicken sandwich, the fruit salad, and even the potent lemonade were all merely appetizers for the main course: Maid in Manhattan. I’m anxious to hear what Uber-blogger K Jo. has to say. I for one found it to be predictable, cute, and not too special. My date enjoyed it though. I’d say it wasn’t worth the $6.50 I paid for matinee, but I’d also say that I could’ve watched J-Lo for many many more hours. The kid was cute too. Actually, the whole supporting cast was pretty solid.
My final thoughts on this issue for the evening involve the exchange between J-Lo and R-Fi that you’ve probably seen in trailers.

J-Lo: “I only came tonight to tell you that we can’t see each other anymore.”
R-Fi: “Then you shouldn’t have worn that dress.”


Cute, but he’s right. What’s with that dress? Was the point to make her not quite fit in? That worked. She looked orange. I mean, come on the woman looks spectacular in a maid’s outfit, in a borrowed hoodie, in corduroy pants; and you’re telling me that they couldn’t find a dress?


That’s all I have to say about that.

I went to blog and nothing came out.

The current worries in my life:
1. Thinning hair
2. expanding waistline/lack of exercise
3. never leaving the Tax Aide department at AARP
4. Dying a lonely, dirty, rotten old man

Disclaimer: I also have daily sort of worries like "does my breath smell ok?" but these are the big ones that aren't as important as they seem this morning.

P.S. At the moment my breath does not smell ok. The night and a healthy helping of Apple Zings (registered trademark) have not contributed to minty freshness.

Some things I think you should know:
1. The Gilmore Girls is a good show. 3 out of 4 roommates agree. I watch it. I like it. My only wish is that I could watch 24 first and then cool down with the girls.
2. I smelled my 8th grade girlfriend today. Ol factory memory is a strange thing.
3. I have not done anything nude since Feb., although in April I heard rumors of a guy snowboarding in his designer jockey shorts with or without a neon green cowboy shirt.
4. The 4th rule of Blogspots. Don't talk about blogspots.

I can easily fall in love with a mole on a cheekbone,
but I can't imagine falling in love with a girl connected to a mole.

Merry TubaChristmas.

I bet you don't remember when Saturdays were for baby showers either.
Awkward social situation turned into nice evening with surrogate family.
I talked with my friend Monika's sister's friend's father about a future in sales. Ok, fine. He talked.
I also learned the difference between second cousins and first cousins once removed.
It's a generation thing.
Meanwhile Christmas cards are not forthcoming. I've decided to return to Valentines. It's Justin's fault. So get me your address by late January. Look at that, I'm like a procastinator's dream.

Remember when Friday nights were for dates? Me either.
But snow shoveling will cure what ails ya.