Ways my life is not like my fuzzy recollection of the Dukes of Hazzard
1. The only woman in town is neither my cousin nor wearing short-shorts.

2. My brother and I don't live together. The man I live with almost never slides across the hood of his car (at least not when I'm around).

3. The law is not a fat man; though it may or may not be as incompetent.

4. I do not enter my car through the window. No one I know does this. Which begs the question: What's the point of growing up if you don't enter your car through the window?

5. I can't remember the last time I tried to jump a crick 'cause the bridge was out. For that matter, I haven't run from the law in quite some time either.

6. My uncle does not wear overalls or drive a jeep or possibly run moonshine.

7. I do not know anyone named Ennis.

8. The narrator is conspicuously absent.

9. The line between good and evil is not so easy to distinguish outside of Hazzard County.

10. I don't have cool music nor does life freeze right before I'm about to find myself in a whole heap a trouble.