3..2..1..Contacts
I was very pleased yesterday when this statement came out of my mouth, "The worst thing about glasses is when my face hits the ground, THEY FALL OFF!" It's just so true.

7 words, 1 number
Kiera Knightley, Pirates of the Carribean, July 9.

Um. Did I say fondle? I meant caress.

A tale of passion, pain and obsession
At night before I go to sleep, I fondle the inner curves of the disc I keep near my bed. Sometimes I throw in a few scoober fakes to keep my pillow on its toes. When I'm watching TV I hold my disc near or throw it at an unsuspecting chair. During the day, a disc waits patiently in my bag for some attention. And thoughts of Ultimate are never far. I want to tell a girl on my rec team the cut I want her to make and when I want her to make it. I can't get that out of my head. I want to send Chris Royer the explanation of the stack that I just got in my Ultimate Player's Association newsletter. The passion and the obsession are clear then, no? The pain is in my leg. I've decided to take the weekend off in hopes it'll heal. And time stands still. The pain is in my mind.

Word to the wise
If you pass gas and say, "excuse me", that should be the end of it. 10 minutes later you should not seek out the person you passed gas near and explain to them that your "excuse me" was in reference to the earlier gas.

Cat's Cradle is the book I had hoped Closing Time would be.

The more responsibility I'm given, the less I have to do.

Hair today
The baldness has received more compliments than not. Course that could be due to that "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." Still. It's a satisfactory look. Those of you concerned shouldn't be. I am still lovable and huggable. If you don't believe it, come see for yourself.

Gone to a meeting
I attended my first meeting today. It was an intimate affair. About like you'd expect a meeting to be. I smiled and nodded a lot. That's the extent of my people skills.

Julie, beware
Here are my thoughts on my new shiny Mr. Clean head-
*Eat yer heart out Agassi.
*What am I supposed to run my hand through now? Chest hair?
*Do you feel a draft?
*Finally my beard gets the first shampoo lather and not the leftovers.
*shut up. Stop laughing.
*This is the 4th major hairstyle change in my life: straight, spiked, curly (big and small) and this.
*Please don't hate me Julie

That's me!
If you ever visit Chase's links, you'll see one for the St. Patrick's Day race. I was scrolling through looking for Chase when lo and behold I found me. What the ?? When I looked at the date, I found out that I was there. So everyone can calm down now. No one continues to impresonate me.

Don't tell Hoover
On CNN running headlines at the bottom of the screen today I noticed, "Whenever there's a power vacuum, bad things happen."

I like to chase it down
This Ultimate story in Vox gave me chills.

Spinal Tap Humor
My Rec team is calling itself "Stallin' 11". We were team 11 and we wear red. And stallin' 11 is one better than stalling 10. Sometimes you just need to crank it up that extra notch.

The Land of Oz
I went to Lawrence part of this weekend and I have to wonder: Where else can you see girls dancing on cars? Kisses for $1? Nudity in the streets and bars? Where else can you see 20 old friends and make 20 new ones? Chant "put your f$#@ing clothes on and get the f#$% out!"? Where else can neon cowboys, busty street signs and guys advertising moustache rides coexist? Where else is every evil righted by fish sauce and cleats hang like Christmas tree lights from hotel balconies? Where else is "forced hooliganism" so gosh-darned cute? Where else can you play hot Ultimate with hot guys in the cold wet of April? And where else would a jacuzzi replace a shower?
New Orleans comes to mind, but where else in the Midwest?

It's a fickle thing
After 24 hours of being infatuated with a 17 year-old girl that I'll probably never meet, let alone talk to, I'm starting to tire of it. I guess you can only get so much out of a relationship that consists of tiling your desktop with pictures, reading a brief filmography, and replaying scenes of a movie in your head. Ah well. That won't stop me from seeing "Bend it like Beckham" again, that is if you want to go. And you should.
How can they do that?
It turns out AARP no longer stands for anything. I'm sure they'd disagree with that statement, but it's no longer an acronym. It just is A-A-R-P. That's dumb. I'll make it stand for something. Just give me a sec...

The blog entry 45 minutes later
Or an hour and 45 minutes. Or whatever. She's 17. And she was the Princesses (Natalie Portman) "double" in Star Wars.
What is age anyway? Merely a number... and perhaps a law or two...

The blog entry now
I can't love. I only want a fantasized, romanticized version of a woman. What's wrong with me? When will I grow up? (I'm still smiling about Kiera.)

The blog entry 45 minutes ago
I just saw "Bend it like Beckham." It's a movie about sports; girls playing sports, British girls playing sports. Um. How do I put this: I'm in heaven. We're talking accents, soccer balls, and cute cute girls. Even if you scrapped the plot, the humor (both not bad), the interesting side stories AND the light way of dealing with some bigger issues, I think I'd still be on cloud 9. In case you were wondering, my new favorite actress and current crush: Kiera Knightley. I don't even know if I spelled that right, but I promise to make it up to her.

T&A
I'm not on Spring Break. The "real world" doesn't have Spring Break. So I watch MTV's Spring Break. I'm not old enough for Spring Break. It's snowing here.

It'd be cuter if it was figurative
I watched the Friday night launch of Ed. It had me digging at my heart with an Oreo brand ice cream scoop. It's not important why I had the scoop out. The only important thing is that Ed is back. And it kills me. I owe the writers of the show an apology. They're back. I don't think it will last, but at least they pulled themselves up for a time. I thank them for a glimpse into that past of Ed greatness. I don't care if it's fiction; it got me and I miss the Ed crowd.
Good night.
One parting thought: Carol Vescey should not say S.O.B. It doesn't suit her.

Say what?
Sometimes I feel like books choose me. I'm in the middle of two books right now, "Dharma bums" and "Closing Time". I almost never get into the middle of two books. I just can't seem to finish either one. One day I'm wandering around smoking weed and making up poetry and the next I'm talking nonsense, reliving my war days and dying of cancer. And someone has to take responsibility for choosing these works. It's not me.
I'm tempted to consume a fruity alcholic drink and watch TV until I fall asleep, perhaps with my shirt unbuttoned and one sock part way off.

It'll all come out in the wash
*People who say things just to get a rise should be forgiven.
*There are now 3 Saturns in my family and 2 in the driveway.
*Jack Keroauc makes me want to wander.
*People who miss Ultimate games to play Ultimate games should ultimately be forgiven.
*For Doug's sake, if I were Chris I would take Clare and Kate out to dinner and avoid an ugly scene.
*My new favorite word: "Ridiculous"

It's like we're family.
Today I met a guy who is going to join the MUtants and be a J-Scholar next fall. This spring I'll be playing Ultimate with him on Sundays. Kinda neat.
I also met two sisters who I don't believe are sisters. They look nothing alike.